What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 03.07.2025 03:32
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
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I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
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In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
How does the narcissist react when he realizes you no longer care?
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
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Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
How do I cope with the fact that I will never have a girlfriend?
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
Make Nazis afraid again!
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
What do you do you do if your motorcycle chain snaps while riding on the highway?
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
TEXT:
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
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Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
At least until the peyote kicks in ...